A Little Check-In

Hello hello everyone!

Sorry I've been so absent practically all over social media! It's been crazy trying to sort out my schedule and I've had a little medical problem pop up again.

Normally I try to keep this blog pretty upbeat, but it's also a blog about my life so I wanted to include you all in what is going on. 

Back when I was 15 I was diagnosed with clinical depression and anxiety. It really popped up after a traumatic experience and I was harming myself and considering suicide. My doctor put me on medication and counseling and things got better. Throughout the years since then things have been up and down. I've had times when I stopped taking the pills because I felt better and just ended spiraling back down into my depression.

This last round in 2012 I was put back on my antidepressant for good. I was underweight and eventually everything evened itself out and I got better and was back to normal. However, sometime last year I noticed that my depression and anxiety would creep up on me for no reason. I was having panic attacks regularly and would cry at the drop of a hat at absolutely nothing. 

I knew something wasn't right and my doctor agreed that something else was wrong that was fueling my depression and anxiety to pop back up in a cycle.

I go through times when I'm perfectly fine and then others when I can barely drag myself out of bed and have panic attacks just lying in bed.

Currently I just finished going through a downswing and am slowly climbing my way back to normal. I understood that while working out and eating healthy are good for my body and would help somewhat with my depression, it also just wasn't happening. I didn't want to guilt myself or negative-talk myself into making it in for a workout. So I just didn't. I let myself hermit and be quiet when I had the time and then focused on the obligations I had with other people; work, training clients, and therapy with my grandma.

Now that I'm feeling better I plan to get back into the swing of things.

Thanks to all of you who stick around during this lulls when I drop off the face of the earth.
I'll be back soon with some new things!